- Hollywood heavyweight opens up
- Jim's movie cheat sheet - December 19
- Dolly Parton coming back to Australia
- Peter O'Toole: Beyond Lawrence
- Does washing powder damage skin?
- Paul Hogan chats with Darren James
- LIVE from the Queen Victoria Market
- Jim Schembri's movie poster parodies
- RSS Syndicate this blog (XML)
What we're talking about
- Sheldon Cooper on Helen Reddy: I have no idea where that ... I saw Helen Reddy in concert 21 times in the seventies and eighties and she is GREAT! I am looking forward to seeing her ... more
- Gloria on Does washing powder damage skin? Shannon Lush recomends that it is only necessary to use half of the manufacturer says on the packet. Use Carb Soda as a ... more
- Nanette on Around the home with Shannon Lush Hi Shannon and Dennis , I have a green lounge which has dirty hand marks on the arms of the chairs (I think from newspaper) ... more
- mandy on Does washing powder damage skin? I stopped using the powder and switched to a fragrance free low allergy liquid after getting itchy skin about 4yrs ago I use ... more
- Amy Symons on Around the home with Shannon Lush How do I get rid of the smell of spilt milk / ice coffee spilt under seat in car on carpet. more
- Di on LIVE from the Queen Victoria Market is there video or audio of the duet with Denis and Fenella? more
- Daniel James on LIVE from the Queen Victoria Market Great Show and it was a pleasure to be apart of it and sing Oh Holy Night. I was nearly going to ask Dennis to join me for ... more
- Rebecca on New release movie reviews - November 22 I rarely comment on reviews, but the inaccuracy of your Catching Fire review compelled me to do so.*Katniss did know about ... more
- Leeanne on Around the home with Shannon Lush Hello, is it possible I could ask shannon lush 2 questions please?I accidentally put a spot of whiteout on the console In my ... more
- micaelthemick on Essential guide to the Hollywood ... News Limited with the unpaid blue uniform lover and liberal /np tryhard , acting as unpaid public relations .The McCarthyism ... more
- Christine on Mahalia Barnes talks weight loss That's great, congratulations. And I changed my hair colour last week - who cares ! more
- Shane W on Mahalia Barnes talks weight loss Now that's how a real woman should look! Congratulations. more
- Elizabeth Howatt on Jim's cheat sheet- Nov 22 Can someone please tell me which is the video shop that Jim Schembri recommends for classic and hard to find DVDs more
- Jacinta on Mahalia Barnes talks weight loss Congratulations Mahalia!an amazing result - good on you! more
- Catherine on David Campbell chats with Denis Walter Don't we have anyone in Melbourne capable of fulfilling this task? more
- Jim Schembri on New release movie reviews - November 22 Hello Michael. You've totally got me! Having just said how brilliant and well-known he is, I go ahead and get Jim ... more
- Kerry on Around the home with Shannon Lush Hi Shannon and Dennis xMy dogs have urinated on my floor boards they are natural not stained and have left terrible white ... more
- Donna Lee on Around the home with Shannon Lush Hi Shannon,I have your spotless book but am unsure of how to handle a stain of scuff marks on my carpet. I'm not sure what ... more
- Michael Dalton on New release movie reviews - November 22 With regards to your FILTH review, it is actually Jim Broadbent, not David. more
- Dolores Styring on Around the home with Shannon Lush Have dots of glue on my Formica bench. Could you suggest some remedy. Would be very grateful. Dolores Styring more
Jim Schembri's principles of horror films
The fabulous new scare-fest Paranormal Activity 4 employs a huge range of nail-biting horror-movie techniques - some new, nearly a century old. Here are 22 principles the film faithfully obeys and effectively deploys.
Teenagers: Trouble magnets since long before Carrie (1976), they make the best investigators. Also, they scream good.
A Cast of Unknowns: That way you just don't know who's gonna buy it.
Cute Little Kids: What's more disturbing than evil taking up residence inside the innocent? Nothing. (See: The Omen; Children of the Corn; The Innocents; The Bad Seed.)
And Their Imaginary Friends: They're creepy, invisible but, thankfully, not real. Or are they? (See: The Shining.)
Negative Space: Alfred Hitchcock was the master at taking the empty part of the frame and electrifying it with the potential that something awful can happen at any moment. (See: Psycho.)
Misdirection: Lead the audience down the garden path, give them a false sense of security - then pull the rug out from under them. (See: Carrie; Friday the 13th; Misery.)
Stairs: A common feature of most horror-filled homes, chiefly because it keeps the audience off-balance knowing there's a whole floor they can't see. (See: The Exorcist; Black Christmas; The Last Wave.)
Humour: Making light in spook-filled film makes the audience feel all the more engrossed when the jokes dry up and the serious scares hit the fan. (See: Nightmare on Elm Street III.)
Denial: Having at least one person dismiss all the weird goings on serves to raise the stakes when they, too, become embroiled in the proceedings. (See: Paranormal Activity 1.)
Silence: The quieter things are, the more on-edge the audience gets. Because they know it won't last. (See: Creepshow.)
Sudden Movement: It doesn't have to be more than a blur, it just has to be fast. (See: Exorcist III.)
Natural Light: Bad things are supposed to happen in the dark, not in broad daylight. (See: Poltergeist.)
The Haunted House: Big, small, on Earth or in space, home is where the spooks are - and always have been. (See: Event Horizon; The House on Haunted Hill.)
Night Vision: The only thing scarier than what you can't see in the dark is what you can. (See: Silence of the Lambs; 28 Weeks Later; Cloverfield)
Video Verite: Since The Blair Witch Project the ubiquity of video cameras means everything can be recorded from a first-person perspective. So what does that mean? No comfort zone.
Pseudo Scares: A prank by an on-screen jokester still scares the audience, provides a laugh of relief and heightens the tension for when the real ones arrive.
Unseen Activity: What you can't see can be as scary as what you can. Today's hip young filmmakers understand and respect the very same principle those of yore did - that no on-screen depiction of horror can terrify as much as what can be conjured up by the imagination. (See: Rosemary's Baby.)
Bumps in the Night: Sure it's old-fashioned, but nothing jolts like a good, sudden thud. (See: Alien.)
Doors: Just a piece of wood on hinges, but few things generate tension so effectively, especially when opened nice and slowly. Or smashed through with an axe by Jack Nicholson.
Furniture: Can't be trusted ever since that door-slamming chair in The Exorcist. Or that dining set in Poltergeist.
Knives: The one item from the cutlery drawer that deserves a special lifetime achievement award for services to the genre.
I am a gauci
we are family through a connection in canada.
a schembri married my maternal grandfather's sister Lola.
I am sure they are all long gone now; however, I did travel to canada to attend Lola's daughter's wedding to some guy from Gozo (goats according to those from the mainland)
If any of this makes sense to you then you are Maltese, which, depending who you talk to is either a blessing or a curse.
let me know.
And as far as UFOs are concerned, I like Terence McKenna's sentiment:
Looking for intelligent life in the universe by way of SETI is so culture bound that it is like looking for a good italian restaurant on the moon.mark urban Monday 22 October, 2012 - 11:02 PM